So you think you know...
19 October 2006
... how to survive winter
Now, dear reader, this is not the usual winter survivor's post. After all, we are very used to the normal "dress well, eat well" mantras. No, I'm not knocking them, I just think that no-one has tackled the "travel well" issue.
Rain = umbrellas. Rule 1, do not put it on the seat next to you; it only upsets the people who have to sit on that seat. Rule 2, overhead is not a good idea - dripping. Best bet, put it on the floor under your seat and try ever so hard to remember it. The poor train staff must have to pick up thousands over the winter.
Rain and/or cold weather also means all the windows get closed on the train, hence one travels in a sauna. Now, personally, I love a sauna. I just don't like it when I'm dressed to the nines in business suit, silk shirt, and full make-up. (Word to the wise - girls sweat too! Oops - that should read "glow"!) Could we please have some fresh air on the train? After all, we are dressed in our winter coats (oh god, I love a good lead in, don't you?)
Cold = coats. Yes, we will ALL be a couple of inches wider - winter coats do that. Please, please don't do the elbow war - it's very petty, and just winds everyone up.
Cold leads to "colds". It is the season of sniffles, snuffles, coughs, and other obnoxious bodily stuff. For goodness sake, BUY SOME TISSUES!!!!! It is very early in the "cold, flu, etc" season, and already my hackles rise at the very attractive guy on the train who sniffs all the time. Excuse me, sweetheart, but that is SUCH a turn off. Use a handkerchief; if it's crisp white linen, even better. Sitting there snorting like a coke head is NOT sexy!
Rain = umbrellas. Rule 1, do not put it on the seat next to you; it only upsets the people who have to sit on that seat. Rule 2, overhead is not a good idea - dripping. Best bet, put it on the floor under your seat and try ever so hard to remember it. The poor train staff must have to pick up thousands over the winter.
Rain and/or cold weather also means all the windows get closed on the train, hence one travels in a sauna. Now, personally, I love a sauna. I just don't like it when I'm dressed to the nines in business suit, silk shirt, and full make-up. (Word to the wise - girls sweat too! Oops - that should read "glow"!) Could we please have some fresh air on the train? After all, we are dressed in our winter coats (oh god, I love a good lead in, don't you?)
Cold = coats. Yes, we will ALL be a couple of inches wider - winter coats do that. Please, please don't do the elbow war - it's very petty, and just winds everyone up.
Cold leads to "colds". It is the season of sniffles, snuffles, coughs, and other obnoxious bodily stuff. For goodness sake, BUY SOME TISSUES!!!!! It is very early in the "cold, flu, etc" season, and already my hackles rise at the very attractive guy on the train who sniffs all the time. Excuse me, sweetheart, but that is SUCH a turn off. Use a handkerchief; if it's crisp white linen, even better. Sitting there snorting like a coke head is NOT sexy!
The conclusion is, don't sweat the little stuff (although the sniffing does piss me off). We all need to get to work when the weather is atrocious. Just a little thought for fellow travellers goes an awful long way. You never know, your fellow traveller just might be me...
¶ 8:08 pm 0 comments
21 September 2006
..what's sexy
PS - it isn't me! but oh my, she's gorgeous! and black lace - I love my black lace.
Wish I could find such a dress, but alas, I'd never look this good! ¶ 9:12 pm 0 comments
PS - it isn't me! but oh my, she's gorgeous! and black lace - I love my black lace.Wish I could find such a dress, but alas, I'd never look this good! ¶ 9:12 pm 0 comments
18 August 2006
... how to recover from a holiday
Back from Spain. It was far too hot to sit in the sun, but the heat melted my bones, de-stressed me completely. Or was that the Cava, so cheap, so bubbly, so mmmm?
The mosquitoes weren't on holiday, alas. I am bitten to pieces, even two on my face! Anti-mossie stuff is required.
This holiday doesn't need recovering from - I know, I'm misleading you again, dear reader - but I'm trying to think how to prolong this relaxed, rubbery boned feeling. Just driving back from the airport has eroded some of that feeling. Driving in the south of England is enough to stress anyone out, as I'm sure some of you know.
Oh, and there was no holiday sex; just not my style. So sorry for those searching on "holiday sex". (Quiet snigger - I'm far too aware of internet proclivities these days.)
Abrupt ending, but bed calls. I will return... ¶ 10:25 pm 0 comments
The mosquitoes weren't on holiday, alas. I am bitten to pieces, even two on my face! Anti-mossie stuff is required.
This holiday doesn't need recovering from - I know, I'm misleading you again, dear reader - but I'm trying to think how to prolong this relaxed, rubbery boned feeling. Just driving back from the airport has eroded some of that feeling. Driving in the south of England is enough to stress anyone out, as I'm sure some of you know.
Oh, and there was no holiday sex; just not my style. So sorry for those searching on "holiday sex". (Quiet snigger - I'm far too aware of internet proclivities these days.)
Abrupt ending, but bed calls. I will return... ¶ 10:25 pm 0 comments
24 July 2006
... how to drive a car
OK - it's only been one week since I've been behind the wheel. It feels like a lot longer. I am now a commuter; I sit on a train driven by someone else, no longer in control. It's great!
But, I love driving my car. I love the freedom of pointing her nose in a direction and just going (traffic permitting of course). And in my car, I'm my own company. I don't have to avoid eye contact with the creep opposite, or tune out the kching kching of someone else's mp3 player, or try to ignore the fact I'm melting in the heat of the train/bus. Yes, London is still sweltering, and yes, trains and buses are not air-conditioned. Well, the newer trains are, but that doesn't kick in unless the train is in motion. Is that silly, or what?
My car sits, neglected where once she was adored every day; her V6 sits waiting for my whim. Damn, I sound like a man - but, I do love driving my car!
Only a week, and I had forgotten the sexy snarl under the bonnet. ¶ 8:54 pm 0 comments
But, I love driving my car. I love the freedom of pointing her nose in a direction and just going (traffic permitting of course). And in my car, I'm my own company. I don't have to avoid eye contact with the creep opposite, or tune out the kching kching of someone else's mp3 player, or try to ignore the fact I'm melting in the heat of the train/bus. Yes, London is still sweltering, and yes, trains and buses are not air-conditioned. Well, the newer trains are, but that doesn't kick in unless the train is in motion. Is that silly, or what?
My car sits, neglected where once she was adored every day; her V6 sits waiting for my whim. Damn, I sound like a man - but, I do love driving my car!
Only a week, and I had forgotten the sexy snarl under the bonnet. ¶ 8:54 pm 0 comments
22 July 2006
... what to wear
New job = brilliant! Wearing office clothes again = argggh!
I've worn jeans and a t-shirt to work for over 18 months, and now, I've got to look "corporate". I've forgotten how much I hate ironing, and embarrasingly enough, how to walk in heels. I nearly ended up on my ample butt the first time I put a pair of them on, after years in flatties and steel toe cap boots. It's not like they were 4" either, just a very modest 1½", but still impossible to walk in at first!
But, I've also forgotten how sexy it feels to be wearing very naughty underwear underneath those oh so polite office clothes. No more sensible cotton for me; mesh and lace and satin and silk and ooooo, ribbons! I've never been a "girlie" woman really. I work in a very male-orientated world, and I've always been "one of the boys". Time to change that, don't you think?
But now, gentle reader, I am letting my inner girlie have free rein, which is - there is no other word for it - delicious! Instead of Marks & Sparks' best, it's online shopping for the sexiest underwear I can find.
I sent my online friend (male) a pic of me in a pair of them. He said "Do we have to stay just friends? Phwoar!"
Oh, it makes a woman feel good, that kind of response! I think I'm going to like being a woman again, don't you?
(Exclamation mark count: 7) ¶ 6:14 pm 0 comments
I've worn jeans and a t-shirt to work for over 18 months, and now, I've got to look "corporate". I've forgotten how much I hate ironing, and embarrasingly enough, how to walk in heels. I nearly ended up on my ample butt the first time I put a pair of them on, after years in flatties and steel toe cap boots. It's not like they were 4" either, just a very modest 1½", but still impossible to walk in at first!
But, I've also forgotten how sexy it feels to be wearing very naughty underwear underneath those oh so polite office clothes. No more sensible cotton for me; mesh and lace and satin and silk and ooooo, ribbons! I've never been a "girlie" woman really. I work in a very male-orientated world, and I've always been "one of the boys". Time to change that, don't you think?
But now, gentle reader, I am letting my inner girlie have free rein, which is - there is no other word for it - delicious! Instead of Marks & Sparks' best, it's online shopping for the sexiest underwear I can find.
I sent my online friend (male) a pic of me in a pair of them. He said "Do we have to stay just friends? Phwoar!"
Oh, it makes a woman feel good, that kind of response! I think I'm going to like being a woman again, don't you?
(Exclamation mark count: 7) ¶ 6:14 pm 0 comments
14 July 2006
... you've got a crap memory
I'm sure it won't be the last time, but I've just embarrassed myself in print! When I realised, I first went ice cold, then the blush travelled from my chest to the top of my head! Oh boy, was I red! Now, I'm not the blushing kind; after all, I've just spent 19 months on a construction site, so very little embarrasses me.
However, I get very embarrassed at faux pas which, unfortunately, I have a huge penchant for! Over on one of my favourite blogs, I posted a comment that I wouldn't be able to write a post for that blog, as my life is so boring.
Unfortunately, I went back and re-read the post I was referring to, and realised that I'd totally, and I mean TOTALLY, mis-read the damn thing! I would be blogging about HIS life, not mine!
OK - tell me, am I self-centred? I mean, you can tell me, right...
Mortified of London hits "publish post" and runs.....
¶ 5:05 pm 0 comments
However, I get very embarrassed at faux pas which, unfortunately, I have a huge penchant for! Over on one of my favourite blogs, I posted a comment that I wouldn't be able to write a post for that blog, as my life is so boring.
Unfortunately, I went back and re-read the post I was referring to, and realised that I'd totally, and I mean TOTALLY, mis-read the damn thing! I would be blogging about HIS life, not mine!
OK - tell me, am I self-centred? I mean, you can tell me, right...
Mortified of London hits "publish post" and runs.....
¶ 5:05 pm 0 comments
11 July 2006
... who your friends are
If in any way slightly depressed, pass over this particular blog, please. It depresses me just to write it!
Years of intermittent friendship have just gone down the plughole. The only way I can cope with this is denial; deny I've been taken for a fool; deny he stole from me (albeit such small things); indeed, deny that part of my life.
Never again shall I be altruistic. Never again shall I offer my home to anyone.
Of course, that makes me even angrier, as this whole ghastly experience has coloured my world view. How DARE he influence even when no longer part of my world!
Ah well, thus I draw a line in the sand and turn my face to the future, a little more cynical than before.
I start a new job, very soon, and therefore a new life. And, dearest reader, two dates already... gosh, if I'm not careful, I might have a sex life soon! Which, I'm sure, will make us ALL perk up!
¶ 7:45 pm 0 comments
Years of intermittent friendship have just gone down the plughole. The only way I can cope with this is denial; deny I've been taken for a fool; deny he stole from me (albeit such small things); indeed, deny that part of my life.
Never again shall I be altruistic. Never again shall I offer my home to anyone.
Of course, that makes me even angrier, as this whole ghastly experience has coloured my world view. How DARE he influence even when no longer part of my world!
Ah well, thus I draw a line in the sand and turn my face to the future, a little more cynical than before.
I start a new job, very soon, and therefore a new life. And, dearest reader, two dates already... gosh, if I'm not careful, I might have a sex life soon! Which, I'm sure, will make us ALL perk up!
¶ 7:45 pm 0 comments
